The Party
by compass54
Summary: Bored Edward meets refreshingly honest Bella. A frustrating day of moving house turns into a night at a birthday party, where bare chests, ouzo and strippers become a recipe for falling in love - a short bit of fluff as a birthday present for Heather Maven. E&B AH Humor/Romance Rated M
1. Chapter 1

_**Bored Edward meets refreshingly honest Bella. A frustrating day of moving house turns into a night at a birthday party, where bare chests, ouzo and strippers become a recipe for falling in love - a short bit of fluff as a birthday present for Heather Maven. E&B AH Humor/Romance**_

_**...**_

**Chapter 1 – Convenience**

_**EPOV**_

I shut the lights off in the lab. Once again, I'm the last to leave, having said goodnight to each of the team as they left to go home to their partners and families, for home cooked food and regular sex. The _mistake_ I've made is starting to numb my brain and it's time to do something constructive about it while I still have choices.

I think about tonight's choices. I can go home with take-out, go home and microwave something unappetizing or since it's Wednesday, I can skip dinner and go fuck my girlfriend, or rather my non-exclusive, pseudo-girlfriend who doesn't cook and who doesn't particularly inspire me to make things more permanent. However, I always get Wednesdays – and I usually take 'em.

Tanya is incredibly beautiful and boring. Like many other trophy women I've been involved with, she cares more about her appearance than the news headlines. I don't even think she realizes how bored I am, that I feel like I'm on a treadmill. The guys I work with think I'm the luckiest man alive to be tapping her and frankly, I'm not interested enough to discuss it when it's not that great – they think I'm keeping the details to myself.

The most exciting thing in my life is the move coming up this weekend. Tanya is moving into a large apartment with two other friends. I've already met one of them and she is also beautiful but I don't know her well enough to gauge if she's boring. Rosalie Hale seems friendly enough but she keeps her distance for some reason. I guess she's shy, so she's probably boring. Ho hum – it's embarrassing what I do for good-looking pussy.

The third one is already in town somewhere, a friend from college and a schoolteacher, an English schoolteacher to be exact, called Bella. I bet she's the most boring of the three. Will she live up to the name? Perhaps she's an Italian beauty, a sublime creature worthy of a precious sculptor's attention? I seriously doubt it. I'm imagining the plaid skirt and the shirt buttoned-right-up-to-the-collar – sensible shoes – Christ I can feel the yawns starting already.

Not that Tanya and I were ever particularly spontaneous, but I can see this weekend being the end of us. The prospect of having to make polite conversation with two women I don't know for who knows how long while maneuvering their roommate into bed with me is going to be demoralizing. I can't bear the thought of one of them saying, "See you next Wednesday!"

Just... no.

I'm doing the right thing, however, moving Tanya into the apartment, and then I think I'll leave her to it. I need to face the fact that I'm wasting my time.

Tanya batted her false eyelashes at my brother, Emmett, so he's also been roped in to moving her stuff. Thank God. Otherwise I'll be doing it myself, or with one of Tanya's other acquaintances – I'd rather pull my shoulder out than meet one of her other "friends". It would do my head in, what's left of it.

Early on Saturday morning, Tanya wakes me to go pick up the truck and I groan. She was all over me last night, in payment no doubt for the hell that's before me – not a bad blowjob really – she's quite talented when she makes an effort and thinks about me for a change. The thing is, she won't swallow so she makes me put on a condom so I can fuck her to finish. I asked her if she'd consider blowing me with the condom on and she looked at me like I had two heads. It was worth a try. Believe me, there is nothing worse than trying to estimate how long you've got to go before you need to pull out, get covered and get back in somewhere else. It takes all the enjoyment away from the deed when there's a good chance you'll end up blowing in a condom not buried in something. You may as well jack off and let it rip – a prospect that's become more attractive every week I've spent with Tanya.

Emmett and I knock out the heavy stuff by lunchtime and we do a last trip to Tanya's; emptying it completely. Rosalie had the good sense to get a professional team to do _her_ move. When we get back, the girls are arguing over the configuration of the living room furniture, seemingly unable to carry anything in from the truck until they make this vital decision.

"Is there any cold beer?" Emmett calls out to them just as I think the same thing.

"Not unless you brought it!" Rosalie replies sarcastically as she struggles with a couch. This is fucking ridiculous and I'm over it. No blowjob is worth this shemozzle.

I try to intervene and get someone to help. "Girls, girls, girls, we have a truck to unpack in the driveway."

"Not my stuff!" Miss Hale has a large stick up her ass with a bitch flag on the end.

"Well thanks very much!" Emmett calls out and leaves, hopefully to bring in some boxes and not drive off on me. I swear I wouldn't blame him with the attitude in this room.

"Tanya!" I raise my voice one decibel below blowing a fuse.

"Okay, I'll be there in a minute!"

I storm out and thankfully come upon Emmett with three boxes on a trolley. "We get this shit inside the door and then we leave them to it."

"Agreed - I'll owe you one, Em."

"You'll owe me more than one, little brother. Why are you with her again?"

"Just shoot me."

Tanya makes it outside for one trip and we soon realize we're better off without her because she wants to bring the boxes inside according to some harebrained system she concocted back at her apartment. Emmett shuts her down by saying this is not a fucking multi-storey office move and we'll bring them in as we find them. She huffs off and doesn't pester us again. The shit-eating grin on Em's face when she takes off makes me double over in laughter, the first enjoyment I've had so far today. I really shouldn't laugh at a woman I sleep with, but unfortunately, that time has arrived.

After that, everything is funny. We start speculating on the contents of the boxes based on their weight and come up with some hilarious possibilities. Then we start taking bets on the actual contents of the ones we can get into and amazingly, I lose fifty bucks – it says a lot really.

I'm still laughing as I hand him the note from my wallet when a girl comes up to us wheeling two huge glossy red suitcases and asks us if we're having fun. I nod at her thinking she looks the exact opposite of the two women inside as she's lugging her own stuff and managing very well. She looks around and then turns in the direction of their apartment, I suppose to get in the elevator and go up to a level where chaos hasn't taken over; but soon there's a whole lot of screaming coming out of their ground floor apartment, the kind that means this is the third roommate, the English schoolteacher roommate.

After a few minutes, we hear raised voices and suddenly the three of them come out, Rosalie and Tanya looking like they've been whipped, and they offer to take a box each. The newcomer apologizes profusely, saying she thought we were just hot moving guys when she spoke to us before and didn't realize we were here to help out.

I'm a bit overwhelmed by this pocket powerhouse and the girls trotting off with their boxes so I only hear Emmett when he clicks his fingers in my face. "Did you hear that? She said _hot_ moving guys. The lady has taste."

"And good manners, Em."

"And sensational ta-ta's, Ed."

"Has she?"

"Tell me you noticed the rack, Edward."

"I thought she looked quite small, petite actually."

He just snorts and shakes his head at me. I really didn't notice what she looked like. I must be shutting down the draw of the anatomy of good-looking chicks. The three of them come straight back out and I hand Tanya one of the lighter boxes to take in. I realize now what Em was talking about, like I must have been fucking blind to miss that swell poking out of the top of the tank top, but it's got me now. I can barely keep my eyes off it. She is petite but taller than I thought. I can't tell what her hair is like because it's twisted up on her head but she's staring at me for some reason and soon I catch on that she's waiting for me to hand her a box to carry in. The smirk on her face tells me she knows I've been checking her out and she responds by running her beautiful brown eyes over me in a full body scan. She seems to like what she sees.

"You're Edward, right?" she says, still smirking and tempting me to make a decision about whether there's a bra under that tank top or not. Fucking Emmett – he got me into this state by pointing them out. When I nod stupidly, she turns around and I hear her giggle as she walks inside. I notice the rear end is not bad either. I shake myself out of my funk and look directly into my brother's broad grin.

He says to me, "You better be careful you perve because you just watched a shit-storm of trouble walk into that apartment where your girlfriend lives."

"Yep, she's got my interest. What girlfriend?"

He starts to laugh and says, "I might have to visit you over here and get front row seats for this one. What's your regular night again?"

"Wednesdays."

I jump in the back of the truck to get the last of the boxes out, wishing I could drag this out a little longer so I can watch her arrive and depart a couple more times. Just one more load is all it takes and Tanya announces the truck has to go back before four - that's where my car is. I'll have to think fast to get myself invited back.

I look out the window and see Bella pulling another two huge suitcases and I rush out to help her. At first, she says she's fine, but I insist on helping and she tells me she's lucky that Tanya and Rosalie have everything because all she has are clothes and books. She doesn't offer any more information and now I'm intrigued as to why.

I stand around looking at my watch, waiting for one of them to offer me something, but nothing is forthcoming so I say I'm going to drop off the truck. They barely notice as Tanya tries to sort her boxes into the correct rooms, huffing and pushing them around the apartment with her foot. I suppose at least she's doing something constructive now and the arguing has ceased.

I give up, call out goodbye and leave when I get no response. Just as I start the truck, Bella comes racing out and asks me if she can join me, telling me she's going to spring for dinner and beers to thank us for our help. At least someone cares. I'm surprised Emmett's still there because I thought he disappeared but she tells me he's asleep on the couch now that the moving is done. They can rattle pots and pans all they want and he'll never wake up.

"So, Edward, Tanya told me you two are not exclusive. How exactly does that work?" That's an interesting question from someone I've just met. She's obviously not shy.

"Truth?" She nods and waits. "It means we don't like each other enough to commit to a real relationship. It's probably another way of saying it's convenient."

"No, I should have said how could that possibly work? I mean you're…" She fans out her hand over me.

"Old? Boring? Confused? Incapacitated?" I have no idea what she'll choose for an answer.

She laughs to herself and says, "Hot, incredibly hot. How can she share you?"

I try to ignore the compliment and tell myself she's just being nice, but my pulse rate has other ideas. "She knows I'm not seeing anyone else."

She actually huffs at me. "Well, fuck me. I know she's not the sharpest tool in the shed, but I never figured she was an idiot."

I frown at her, momentarily confused. "Why did you agree to move in with her if you don't like her?" I can't wait for this answer.

She chuckles before thinking about what she wants to say. Then her expression changes and she looks kind of sad. "Well the guy I was living with broke up with me over the phone and when I came home, the apartment was empty... of furniture. He took everything we owned, leaving me with my books and clothes."

"Oh, that sucks." My heart goes out to her. She has an actual story and it's not pretty.

"So you see, Edward, it's convenient for me to be with Tanya as well."

I'm quiet, thinking about convenience and how dull it is when something about this strikes me as funny and I start to laugh. She joins me with a belly laugh that is real and very sexy and I feel it - there's something interesting going on here between me and this unusually honest girl. It's refreshing and incredibly attractive.

Bella's idea of springing for dinner is not pizza or Chinese but groceries. She tells me how bad fast food is for you so I go along, half agreeing with her, but shit, I hope she doesn't want me to cook any of it because that would be a pointless exercise. When I tell her my arms are too weak to cut through a carrot, she grips my upper arm and tells me to stop lying. I'm not lying - everything feels shaky and strained. We pick up some wine and beer and she wants at least one six pack to be light because she has to be somewhere tonight. I must have had a disappointed look on my face because she asks me if I want to come with her. I seriously struggle to answer the question because that tiny innuendo causes my cock to twitch and I have to concentrate on not getting a boner in a grocery store where the woman at the cash register might accuse me of… trying to steal something.

I ask her where she's going and she says a birthday party. I tell her it sounds too personal for me to be crashing someone's birthday party with a girl I've only met today and she shrugs, saying I can stay home on a Saturday night if I want but that she's sure I'll get a kick out of this one because her friend, Heather, knows how to throw a party. She does that full body scan thing again and the way she says it makes me interested so I agree. The truth is _she's_ interesting. Everything we've done is pretty mundane but I'm enjoying myself and I think it's because she's with me. She's been open about the fact that she finds me attractive but she doesn't babble on with a lot of mindless questions and she hasn't probed any further about Tanya, innately knowing that there's nothing intelligent to discuss on that subject.

We get back to the house and the amount of unpacking completed is miniscule. Bella starts opening doors and drawers, investigating where she can put her groceries and huffing when she realizes Tanya and Rosalie have failed to unpack any cooking utensils or pots. I can see she's boiling and I help her to unpack what we've bought by placing items on the counter, not trying to organize anything but giving her an overview of what we've got. She seems to understand my process of helping and smiles at me, asking me if I'd like an ice cream. I find myself nodding because as soon as she says it, something cool and creamy sounds really appealing. She doesn't call the others who are rattling around in their bedrooms and we know from the snoring that Emmett is still on the couch, so it's just the two of us, sitting on stools, ready to enjoy our ice cream.

I soon find out that is one of Bella's favorite things. She moans as she licks and sucks with her eyes closed, and I'm wondering if she's doing it on purpose to get a rise out of me. It's working. I keep stopping to watch her and the filth that fills my head is disgusting. She's been sweet and honest and nothing but nice to me and all I can think of is her icy tongue on me…

In my dreamy state, I start to lean closer to her with every lick and suddenly I'm not holding my ice cream upright. It drips on her chest, not her top, but right onto her skin, to the side, on the swell of her tits. She realizes and looks down with a squeak as the drips start sliding down her breast towards the cleavage and then disappear. I hold my breath and pull back my fingers from creeping forward towards what remains of the trail of melted ice cream. I have an overwhelming urge to put my tongue into her cleavage and lap up the damage but that would lead to a slapped face, an erection in public and no invitation back, ever. Jesus.

Her eyes bug out at me as she licks the ice cream stick clean and then holds it in her mouth while she jumps up to walk around to the sink, checking between her tits. She runs water on a cloth, pulls the front of the tank down slightly and then pushes the cloth deep down into the cleavage. I get my answer from before – the bra is lacy and hot pink. While she's busy, I adjust myself and look around to see if I've been caught. A little delayed, I apologize and she tells me not to worry about it. She throws the stick in the trash and goes back to looking for things to cook with. I'm left in shock; absolutely certain she has no idea what she just did to me.

Soon, she has everything she needs and starts browning some beef, asking me if I like Mexican. I tell her I love it and she hits me with a big beaming smile that seriously melts me. Previously unable to cook anything, I find myself standing next to her, stirring minced beef and sprinkling in assorted spices according to her instructions, hoping I don't mess this up. She seems very grateful for my help until she asks me to open a can of beans she purchased and I start to laugh. I'm finding the smallest things are amusing today and one of them is my brother full of Mexican food with beans. She wants me to explain and I just can't go there. She even tries to poke me in the ribs and I don't cave.

In frustration, she asks me to stir the beans in, then add a can of tomatoes and turn the stove down to low. She then inspects the oven with a groan and it takes me ages to open the two cans, mainly because I'm watching her ass shimmy as she scrubs the oven out with gusto. My head starts to spin with fantasies again, this time I'm holding her hips gently before me as she fucks back onto my cock, watching it enter her over and over again.

I have to excuse myself to go the bathroom and I sit down with my head in my hands, wondering what the fuck is happening to me. I'm not that sex starved and she hasn't given me any encouragement except for a few interested looks and one – well two – comments about my being hot. I'm used to that and it doesn't normally effect me like this. I'm so totally out of my depth and know Tanya is going to notice soon enough. It's a wonder she hasn't been out already wondering what I've been doing all this time with her new roommate, so I think the writing is on the wall - she's as uninterested in me as I am in her. She's always given me a green light to see other people and I've finally found someone I want, no _need,_ to pursue. There are just too many things to like about her to ignore it, especially since she seems to be single – speaking of which, I had better clear that up. I have no idea how long ago she got cleaned out by the ex. She could have been with someone else since, someone who could be there tonight. I decide there's only one way to find out.

The dinner is excellent and everyone is relaxed. We've all decided to give the party a go and I see a moment of vulnerability in Rosalie when she asks Emmett if he'll make sure he arrives with her so she doesn't have to go in alone. I never think of arriving at a party from the perspective of a beautiful woman when every schmuck in the room eyes her up, thinking he has a chance with her. It must be daunting. It's nice to see a different side of Rosalie, one where she has blood in her veins. Emmett doesn't hesitate either so he must have had some interaction with her that I didn't see because all I heard was a lot of snoring this afternoon. I offer to take everyone in my car. It's a squeeze but the party's not far.

"No, I have to take my car," Bella answers, and I momentarily look at her, wondering why she's suddenly creating distance when the group thing was just starting to become friendly. She shrugs at me and says, "I don't have a bed here. They're not delivering it until Monday, so I'll probably stay at Heather's."

It wouldn't be appropriate at this point to blurt out that she could stay with me so I look down at my empty plate and when I look up at her again, she's smiling at me, turning her head slightly. I smile back and start collecting plates.

My brother turns out to be a genius. "Edward, you go with Bella. I'll take the two gorgeous blondes with me," he says wiggling his eyebrows. The two blondes in question start to giggle and both nod. That's twenty-fucking-million I owe you big brother.

This is the point where things get awkward. The girls have a bathroom each and there's a spare in the hallway that Emmett's already parked himself in. I guess I'm expected to go with Tanya and get dressed, especially since my spare clothes are packed in one of the boxes in her bedroom. She's sensing the change as much as I am, like she doesn't want me to get too comfortable in the new place. She hands me a box with my name on it, half-full of my clothes, while she steps into her bathroom. It's like she's saying, "See ya later." That's how I take it anyway. I'm so ready to embrace the idea of a break.

I grab a beer from the fridge and check the view from the front door when I hear the click of shoes on the tiles. I turn round to see Bella, coming up the hallway, ready to go. She's looks incredible in a sexy black dress that clings to every curve on her body.

Her legs are long, shapely and fantastic, especially in heels.

Her hair is down, smooth and glossy, the kind of hair you could lose yourself in.

Her eyes are subtly smoky and her full lips greet me by turning up in a smile.

I feel myself sigh.

As if I'm not already blown away, she walks right up to me and kisses me on the cheek, thanking me for helping today. My hands touch her silky hair and suddenly I'm lost for words. What eventually spews out of my mouth is, "You look… beautiful, especially the backpack. Glad it's the same color as the dress." She looks down and then I hear that belly laugh again. I resist the urge to grab her and hug her.

"It's my overnight bag. Are you looking for a bathroom? Mine's free."

I thank her and take my box up to the end on the left. Thank God, it's not next to Tanya's room because I already want to keep my distance from her. I pull off my t-shirt and look around for something to use to shave with when I hear Bella's voice calling my name. For a moment she stands there like she's stunned, then she crouches on the floor at one of those huge suitcases, pulls out a towel and a large cosmetic bag, finds me a razor, stands and looks over my face.

"You're going to shave aren't you?" she asks innocently. It comes out sounding more like a request than a question - it's a very personal thing to say to me if she's not interested. If I just read that right, she just told me she likes smooth shaven men and there's a good chance she'll let me get close enough for her to touch my face tonight.

Then she smiles at me as if she's waiting for me to say something. I look down at the razor and realize she's still expecting an answer. Nervously, I chuckle and nod, then head for the bathroom and just as I go through the door I chance a last glimpse of her. She's leaning back, holding onto the door frame and when she realizes I've caught her, she raises a foot behind her, rolls her eyes and says, "Damn shoe." She gives me a slightly embarrassed smile before heading down the hallway and I'm sure I hear her whisper, "Fuck," through a big puff of air.

I'm grinning as I close the door of the bathroom, ready to do the best damn shave job I can.

_**...**_

_**A/N**_

_**Maybe one or two more chapters, Heather, just so you know we didn't forget you.**_

_**This fluff was beta'd by Edwards Beachlover who knocked it into shape at the very last minute.**_


	2. Chapter 2 - You Want Me To Do What?

_**Bored Edward meets refreshingly honest Bella. A frustrating day of moving house turns into a night at a birthday party, where bare chests, ouzo and strippers become a recipe for falling in love - a short bit of fluff as a birthday present for Heather Maven. E&B AH Humor/Romance**_

_**...**_

**Chapter 2 – You Want Me To Do What?**

**EPOV**

Driving to the party, Bella asks me lightheartedly if I can keep an open mind. When I shrug, not really understanding what she means, she assures me quite matter-of-factly that whatever happens she knows I'll have a great time. I don't know what I've got myself into at this point and when I try to get her to be more specific, she scrunches up her face and says there's going to be strippers. I tell her that Emmett will love it and she laughs, asking me if he's into guys.

Oh, now I get it. It's going to be a very long night.

The image of drunken women and male strippers that fills my head is the last thing I need when all I want is an opportunity to get to know Bella and find out if she's single. I think she misinterprets my look of disappointment and assures me that everyone always enjoys one of Heather's parties.

When we pull up, we're in front of a huge house with lights blazing from every window. It's not what I was expecting. This is a big family home with a perfectly manicured lawn.

Robin Thicke is blasting as we walk up the driveway and I'm feeling decidedly under-dressed with Bella in her sexy black number and me in black jeans and a button down. I ask her about a dress code and she looks me up and down, smirking as she answers, "You look great. What you have on is perfect." For some reason, the smirk coupled with those words makes me uneasy, wondering what I'm perfect for.

We climb the front steps and find a line to get in. I lean up to find out what the delay is and hear Bella giggle. She rubs her hand up my arm and speaks in my ear, "Remember what I said, Edward, keep an open mind, okay?" I can't see anything and wonder if she knows what's about to happen.

Soon enough I see what the problem is and my gut drops like an elevator, debating whether I've worked out enough this week for this. There's a buxom beauty moving to the music as she greets all the arrivals, insisting every male removes his shirt or she won't let him in. She has an assistant, bare-chested of course, sporting a ten-gallon hat, with a pile of shirts to deal with, trying to hang them on one of those commercial racks from a department store.

I look down at Bella who grins up at me as we approach our turn with the woman who wants to take my shirt. The two girls hold out their arms to each other and I figure this must be Heather as she squeals Bella's name and thanks her for the music she received as a present. Bella introduces me and Heather looks at Bella, nervously wanting to clarify who I am. "Is this Tanya's Edward? Is _she_ coming tonight?"

Some secret look passes between them and then Bella answers with, "Yeah Edward's brother is bringing her. They're not far behind us."

Heather's mouth drops open and she shakes her head. "She's incredible. I will never figure her out." Then she glances at me, embarrassed she's said something against my girlfriend. I keep a neutral look on my face and enjoy making her sweat for a second. She is, after all, about to take my shirt.

Bella shrugs and asks, "What are we drinking?" as if this is a given, along with the men having to remove the top half of their clothing.

"We're keeping with our theme of black and I _looove_ licorice so tonight we're drinking ouzo. Everyone will taste amazing!"

"And probably get hammered, Heather." Bella gives her a tongue-in-cheek look of disapproval.

"Well, there's that too, but there's plenty of room if you want to stay. Come on Edward, off with your shirt!"

I realize I have to do this so I begrudgingly undo my buttons and pull the shirt down over my shoulders, feeling like I want to yank it up again and run. I'm at my most vulnerable here, half naked in a houseful of strangers with no idea why Heather wants the men shirtless.

Bella sees my discomfort and surrounds my upper arms with her fingers, asking for permission with her eyes before gently easing my sleeves down.

It's both exciting and calming. She takes her time with me and I can see her repeating this in a completely different situation, like at my apartment.

She hands over the shirt to the cowboy who seems to be checking me out. I'm hoping it's just a male competitive thing and he's not going to try dirty dancing with me later. The "keep an open mind" comment is doing my head in.

Heather looks me over and something catches in her throat. I've never had ouzo – maybe it burns your esophagus. I won't be able to talk in the morning after this.

I try some when we move into the living room, and a tray full of the stuff appears. Sure enough, it kills on the way down but it's definitely warming when you're shirtless.

I spend the next half hour being introduced to a bevy of female authors and their partners. I find out that Heather is a promoter, combining business with pleasure for this birthday party. The strippers are apparently entertainment for a convention where nearly everyone is a writer and I inquire where Bella fits into this. She says, "Heather was our professor at college before she had her babies. We kept in touch with her because she was like our big sister."

"There they are!" My brother's booming voice fires through the crowd at us. He _will_ love this party after all because he's always happy to show off the results of his work in the gym. He struts over like a pimp with his blonde bookends, both dressed to the nines in black – Christ, he'll be insufferable. He'll be talking about this for weeks.

Tanya gives me the strangest look and walks away immediately to talk to some guy she knows, but Rosalie clings to Emmett's arm. They accept a glass of ouzo each, which Rosalie sniffs and screws up her face over, while Emmett downs it without blinking. He looks at me as if he's been poisoned and I start laughing. Rosalie's giggle is so unexpected it shocks me into more laughter and then she throws back the ouzo, throws up a bitch eyebrow at both of us, takes Emmett's glass and heads over to the bar for more.

I pull Emmett aside and tell him I know something is going on between them. He admits that he's met her before and she pissed him off but the way he looks at her while he's telling me suggests he is turned on by her hostility.

He tells me she's "challenging" and I finally get it. Emmett's one of those guys who wants what he can't have.

"Did you honestly think I was there helping Tanya today?" he nudges me as he asks, still eyeballing Rosalie when she steps onto the dance floor and I watch her looking straight back at him.

Em and I enjoy ourselves watching the girls dance with each other and taking bets on which one of the guys here are the strippers. It's really impossible to tell with all these buff men dancing with women. Hell, maybe someone else is taking bets on whether Emmett and I are strippers. I pass this thought on to Emmett who cracks up with me. This ouzo stuff makes you so warm and happy. I think I like it now.

There's an LMFAO song playing that Em and I both know and we look at each other for a split second before deciding we're out of our minds. We can't dance like we did years ago at home.

Then Amy Winehouse starts singing "Me and Mr. Jones", and all my attention is taken by Bella. Riveted to the spot, I get the full view of her body as she moves to the right, the left, the right again and then spins, each movement separated by a clap.

I'm aware people have joined her but they may as well be invisible. Her hips have mesmerized me, making me want to go over and touch her, dance with her to this sexy song. She senses my mood and beckons me over. I knock back my drink with one thing on my mind – Bella – I'm practically salivating over her, and just as I take a step toward her, a woman smelling of sickly sweet perfume stops me, holding me back with her palm on my bare chest, saying to me, "Do you two accept private bookings?"

I'm still looking at Bella when I mutter, "Sorry?" almost pushing her aside, hoping that Emmett will deal with her but the "fuck" that comes out of his mouth is because he's just snorted ouzo out his nose. Jesus that must kill.

I look down at the hand still on me, willing this person to find her manners but she just leaves it there and I use the tips of my fingers to lift it off and drop it like something nasty.

Emmett grins from behind her as I tell her that we are not strippers. He's wiggling his shoulders, trying to pull my chain. She looks surprised, saying she was sure we were the ones Heather pointed out and I glare at him, trying to get him to stop it and grow up. She must think the glare is for her because she apologizes profusely as I look at her, hardly believing she's still standing there, prolonging the embarrassment for all of us.

"Excuse me, I believe this is my dance," Bella says, saving me, and I follow behind her, holding her hand.

I glance back at the annoying person and see that she's finally disappeared. "I have no idea why that woman thought we were strippers."

"Maybe it's something about the way you look," Bella purrs in my ear and I'm sure I feel her fingers just under the waistband of my jeans for a second before she pulls back and starts dancing. She must have some idea how gorgeous she is the effect she's having on me now. She has a confidence about her that I like and a body that I'd like to get to know.

When we hear the next song, Usher's "DJ Got Us Falling In Love", she smiles and bites her bottom lip before showing me she can really move. The song seems different, watching her dance to it. She has great rhythm and she uses her hips and her ass to show it. I have to hold back from grabbing her, wanting her closer, but I mirror her movements and keep back. The view is better from here anyway. She's not just dancing for herself, she's holding eye contact with me and it's very sexy. I feel it even stronger now, that there is definitely something going on here, electricity, making me feel more alive tonight than I've felt in weeks.

Her eyes drop to my chest and then back up. She leans into me, rubbing her cheek against mine, touching her tits to my chest and says, "You wanna go somewhere a little quieter?"

I answer the rhetorical question with a nod.

She leads me, holding my hand, and we search through the rooms on the ground level, finding people in all of them. It looks like she wants some time alone with me when she leads me upstairs and just as I think she's going to pull me into a bedroom, she stops in the hallway and touches my face.

"That's a very smooth shave, Edward. Did you do that for me?"

I like how direct she is, how there's no bullshit. She's simply testing me to see how much I want her. I could give her the answer in many different ways but I choose to do it with my skin. I rub my very smooth shave against her soft cheek, which gives me access to her neck, where she dabs her perfume, where her hair lingers, infusing its own scent, adding to her own intoxicating aroma, which either attracts or puts you off. In her case, I stay and inhale her, wanting to filter all the air I breathe through this exquisite female smell.

I have to taste it, to find the spot drenched with it, the one that will begin her seduction. I press my lips just to the back of her ear and move down slowly, kissing and licking until her hands tighten on my arms and she lets out her own unique sound. I've found it. I memorize it and file it away in my brain because I know I'm not thinking clearly now. Otherwise, I wouldn't be up here, trying to seduce her in a hallway at her friend's birthday party on the first day I met her. I don't want her to think I'm trying to take advantage of her but I can't stop kissing her neck, moving closer to her mouth. When I reach the corner of her lips, she stops me.

Shit.

"Edward I…" she breathily tells me, "I need to talk to you about your relationship with Tanya."

I sigh but I guess I'm being naïve to think there wouldn't be more questions. I have no idea what Tanya has told them about us, nor do I think she knows enough about me to make more than a superficial assessment.

I take a big breath before starting. It will work better if I just lay it all out for her. "Bella, you witnessed our relationship first hand today. In other words, there is no relationship outside the bedroom. You probably learned more about me today than she's learned in four months. We use each other for sex, Bella. That's it."

She frowns before continuing. "Okay, but I want to know what happened to you. She said you went to college for seven years and now you've dropped out, that you're working in a photo lab. She said you never have any money."

I start to chuckle, thinking that may well be more interesting than the work I am currently doing. "See that just shows how little interest she has in me. I'm a doctor, Bella. I've started my residency as a chemical pathologist in a… pathology lab. I haven't had any money because… well you try working part-time while you're finishing medical school. By the time I started earning money, Tanya and I had fallen into a routine of going to her place and she never said she wanted more."

"But Tanya told me you said you were bored at work. I would have thought being a doctor would be fascinating."

"Yeah, but I've done something stupid. My goal was to be one of those guys on CSI who solve the case with their findings but I took a job in a private laboratory because I was burned out after the long hours of medical school. I just wanted to get a few weekends off. Now I've found myself in this incredibly mind numbing role where I'm not using my training and I've been in a pretty bad place since I realized the mistake I made. I kept the thing going with Tanya as I said because it was convenient and easy but I knew I was starting to stagnate. She gave me the impression today that she wants out as well."

Bella shakes her head and says, "It all fit so perfectly, you hanging around when she's obviously not in love with you and that beat up car you drive. I thought you must have been the biggest loser and now I find out you're a bored biochemist."

Jesus, she's made that connection quickly. "Wow, you know what I do. Most people wouldn't have a clue so I don't usually elaborate. What does an English teacher know about clinical chemistry?"

"Probably more than you think, Edward." She takes my hand and studies it rather than look me in the eyes. "My mother had cancer twice and the second time it killed her. Dad and I lost count of the number of pathology bills we paid."

I want to take her into my arms and tell her everything will be okay but I don't know what she's been through. I've seen cancer through the microscope, like a cannibal unable to sate its appetite. Even through the lens it isn't pretty, but to experience it as it took her mother's life...

"Bella, I'm so sorry. How long ago did this happen?" I gently rub her arm, trying to convey my sympathy.

"When I was still in college and I wanted to drop out – that's when I became close with Heather. She convinced me to go on and finish."

"Well I better be nice to her then."

"Why?" she asks with a cute little smile. She may know there's a compliment coming.

"Because you're here, tonight, with me, celebrating her birthday and there's a future to enjoy."

She stands back and really looks at me, right into my eyes. "You know I would not have picked you as being so nice. I seriously thought you'd be an asshole before I met you. You really surprised me today."

"Well now you know more about me, what do you think?" I ask timidly. I want a positive answer more than anything right now.

"I think it might be wise to try that kiss again."

The smile says it all. She's made up her mind that she likes me and I take advantage of the moment before she has a chance to change her mind. My hand slides in under her silky hair and stops at her neck, taking my time, getting closer and closer, savoring the moment just before it happens for the first time.

Our lips touch and I turn by head further, ready to press in to experience my first kiss with Bella, when someone bounds up the stairs two at a time, shaking the floor. It's Emmett, desperate to find a toilet. Bella points it out and he's gone in a flash. We start again, finding our way when we hear Emmett grunt and talk to himself. "Oh, thank God," he calls out and we can actually hear him piss. I look up, hoping for divine intervention to make it stop and for him to leave quickly.

There is intervention, in the form of Rosalie, treading purposefully in the direction of the same bathroom. Bella calls out, "Hang on Rosalie!"

"Can't wait, sweetheart!" she calls back and opens the door with a force that hits my brother square in the face, knocking him backwards.

"Why didn't you knock?" he screams, holding his nose.

"Why didn't you lock the door?" She yells back, more insulted than shocked.

"I was just taking a quick piss! I didn't realize there were any threats on this floor."

"Well I didn't know anyone was up here!" She gets right up in his face and then starts jiggling up and down. "Please move out of my way. I need to go."

"Jesus!" He storms out, looking at us for some sort of answer, holding a few tissues to his nose that has started bleeding. "She broke my nose."

"Bring it here and I'll look at it." I check out the alignment of the cartilage and it looks fine. He's such a baby. "Go downstairs and ask for an ice pack for the swelling - ten minutes on, ten minutes off. Maybe an Advil or a small ouzo, Em. That will be seventy-five bucks with the family discount."

"Thank God you're in that lab because you have no bedside manner."

"And how would you know what my bedside manner is, Emmy? I might be really jovial with everyone else."

"Jovial – Christ, you're evil, Doctor Cullen," he calls out as he heads for the stairs.

"Edward, call me Edward! Let's not stand on ceremony!" I call after him, hating him to have the last word.

I look at Bella who is grinning from ear to ear and I think about trying to kiss her again but of course, Rosalie coming out of the bathroom interrupts us, asking where he is and if he's okay before running down the stairs.

I sigh, knowing I have a job to do. "I'd better go down and supervise. Otherwise I'll never hear the end of it."

I find him in the kitchen with Rosalie massaging his head while wiggling her ass to the music. He gives me a wink to show he's not mad at me and that he's playing a game with her. I tell him to look at the ceiling and pinch his nose while I ask Rosalie what the track is that's playing. I haven't heard it before but its sexy beat and gravel voiced singer appeal to me. She says it's Alice Russell singing "Breakdown" and I mentally file it away while keeping Em's tissues ready in case of further bleeding, knowing it's already stopped because there'd be blood everywhere by now if it hadn't.

"What you're doing now is perfect, Rosalie. You're keeping him calm."

"Thank you doctor." Em salutes me and closes his eyes, enjoying her fingers in his hair.

"I heard you call him that before. Why do you call him doctor, Emmett?" Rosalie enquires, frowning while looking between us.

"Because he is. He's my mad scientist doctor brother."

She still looks perplexed. "We thought he worked in a photo lab."

"Do you work in a photo lab, Ed?"

"No not that I know of, Em. Maybe they're thinking of a different Edward."

Bella enters the conversation when Rosalie looks like she's forgotten her original question. "It's a pathology lab, Rose. Tanya doesn't listen very well apparently."

Heather comes racing in and says, "Hey you guys, guess what… Oh my God what happened! Are you okay?"

We relate the story, embellishing a little, and she goes straight to the icemaker on the fridge, fills a plastic cup with crushed ice and grabs a sandwich zip-lock bag, which she dumps the ice into. She wraps it up like a pro in a tea towel and hands it to Emmett. The whole process takes her about a minute and it's obvious she's done this before.

She looks very concerned so I tell her it looks worse than it is. I cup my hand to the side of my face and murmur towards her, "He's just acting like a baby."

"I heard that, Edward!" he calls out but doesn't open his eyes.

"I actually came in to tell you we're having a talent quest and we've got one act already, so come and see me if you want to join in."

Those God-awful words "talent quest" - I love to study human behavior when something like this happens. Everyone looks at each other trying to hide their natural terror. They all know there is something they _could_ do but would die a million deaths if they had to do it in public. I look straight over to my brother whose interest is piqued. He's now sitting up, looking straight at me. I shake my head slightly, knowing he's got some scheme hatching and I want no part of it.

A new song starts with a poppy electro beat and Rosalie eyes Bella and smiles. There are a few woops from the crowd and the girls sing the first lyrics of the song "Bring the action."

Rosalie says, "Come on, its Britney bitch!" linking arms with Bella and dragging her out of the room.

"What about me? I'm injured!" Emmett calls after them.

"Sit there all night if you want to!" Rosalie calls back.

Emmett watches her leave and says without looking at me. "God, she's amazing."

I chuckle and tell him to stand so I can check his nose is all right. It's only a tiny bump that will go down quickly so I say, "No digital trauma, okay? Keep your fingers out of there and you'll be fine."

He presents his classic "go fuck yourself" face and pushes past me to get to the dancing female he's now hell bent on having. I'm still laughing at him but I follow, hoping my dancing female is still interested in me too.

I feel nothing but revulsion when I enter the living room and the first thing I see is Tanya draped over some guy, kissing him. She already feels alien to me.

There's a big crowd on the dance floor now, pinned up against each other and when I find Bella in the middle of it, she's dancing with another man, obviously enjoying herself. Rosalie is doing the same. This won't sit well with my big beefy brother who doesn't like anyone touching something of his, even if he hasn't made a claim yet. In his mind, he's already going to, and she won't be able to resist him.

He goes to the bar and brings us back another ouzo each, pouring the whole thing straight down his throat. I've been pleasantly buzzed so far this evening on the stuff but I'm worried about going too far and ending up out of control or even worse throwing up. I take a sip and put the glass down; hoping someone else will come along and drink it for me.

Emmett's now standing with his arms crossed over his almighty chest, staring at his prey on the dance floor who's laughing and giving her hips a good work out. I can see his brain ticking over and it's making me nervous. He's worked up, drunk and wants to join in. He leans into my ear and says some very frightening words. I need to make sure I heard him correctly so I ask, "You want me to do what?"

"You heard me. We could do that thing, Ed."

I immediately shake my head, trying to shut this down before it goes too far. "No way."

He's sticking his neck out and whines at me, "Come on, little brother, you know it's good. They'll love it. Winner winner chicken dinner!" He takes my wrist in his fingers.

"Get away from me." I want to run out the front door and I would, except for those beautiful brown eyes looking at me, reminding me of an interrupted kiss with a lot of potential.

"Ed, please! I could use something to get me back into Rosalie's good books and you know Bella will be watching."

This sounds exactly how he talked me into it in high school. He said we'd get chicks. He was right. We did.

"No, Em. If we have to dance to get their attention, then we're doing something wrong."

He snorts at me. "Don't worry about it. You're probably not fit enough anyway."

"What and you would be?"

"Yeah, I work at it harder than you. I bet you a hundred bucks you couldn't remember the steps anyway."

Oh, now he's full of it. I'd win that bet so easily. "You know that's bullshit. I'd never forget them."

His eyebrows come up at me in a challenge I can't ignore. "Then put your money where your mouth is Cullen."

I puff my chest out at him because he's not going to win. "Okay Cullen, a hundred it is. You drop a step and it's mine."

He takes off and starts talking to Heather, who's nodding her head excitedly and glancing at me. Christ I hope he's told her that it's something we did in high school, that we're nowhere near professional dancers. I suddenly realize he's played me, knowing exactly which buttons to press, and I feel stupid for agreeing to this when the two women we're trying to impress may never want to speak to us again if we fuck up.

Well, I've done it now and as our father always drummed into us, everything is about chance and you don't get anything if you don't take one.

One of the men drags Heather away from Emmett, telling her it's time. Her face bursts with anticipation and the song changes over. What they are playing sounds like stripper music and the man with her pops a cowboy hat on his head. He dances her up to the edge of the dance floor and then two other guys join them, wearing identical hats.

I get out my phone, ready to take some incriminating photos of Bella and Rosalie and I ask Emmett if he knows what song is playing. He says off the cuff that it's one of the tracks from that movie _Magic Mike_ and I'm staggered. I'm not sure what's more surprising – that my brother watches male stripper movies or that he knows the soundtrack from one.

The three start to sway their hips to the music and the prolonged intro finally moves into the song as they slap their hips, perfectly timed. Heather's eyes are now falling out of her head. In fact, most of the women have the same look on their faces. They've all pushed to the front, ignoring whoever they were dancing with and I get a couple of shots of them going into a feeding frenzy. They all have money ready to slip into what's left when the clothing disappears.

The men I've seen at strip clubs act nothing like this. They are so insecure about getting a boner in public they don't enjoy it like they should. Everyone's worried about what the other guy will think of you if you let go of yourself and bite into a stripper's tit or pull her into your lap when that's exactly what we all want to do.

No, women embrace this en mass and support the loss of inhibitions. A group of inebriated women with strippers is terrifying. They have no shame about grabbing and touching their victims inappropriately. I imagine it's a bit like the first day of a clothing or shoe sale. They all fight to get at the items they want.

I seriously don't know how these guys do it.

They are excellent dancers, however, and they use the song well, air humping to the beat and trying in vain to shock this crowd of hyenas, ready to pull them apart, should one of them make a mistake.

By now most of the men have moved away from the screaming women, choosing instead to cling to the comparative safety of the walls of the room and take the occasional photo. I feel the same but my interest in how Bella reacts in this situation keeps me in my spot. She's just one of many, showing no fear, and I get a shot of her calling out to the dancers to take it off. I quickly switch to video mode and just keep it running.

Now the dancers start to undo the buttons on their pants and this sends the girls into hysteria. The zippers come down and two of them start to pull down their pants, quite elegantly and slowly. Some of the women are now showing a more self-conscious side. You can see they are not leaning forward so much, but not Bella. She's determined to see everything up close. The third man comes back with a chair and one by one they sit and get the girls to pull off their pants. The birthday girl is first to take up this challenge and as she finally whips them off; she throws them into the air as the dancer's legs surround her, holding her in place up in his crotch as she screams.

As the other two do the same thing, one of them with Tanya, I start to wonder if these guys are going to go the whole way and what that will do to the girls, if they're forward enough to grab a penis or two. I have to put my hand over my mouth at this point because I don't want anyone to see me laughing. It would be disrespectful to these men who in my opinion are like brave warriors.

Sure enough, the boxers come down and they are wearing tiny g-string thingies that barely contain their junk, let alone leave space for the bills these girls have ready. The screams are deafening now and I begin to feel real terror for these men, about to be pack raped by their customers, wanting to go over and shove some of the women back who get a good feel of them as they shove a dollar or two down the front. Rosalie Hale is one of them. Thank God, Bella isn't that vulgar. She slips her bill under the side edges of the thingy, nowhere near the man's junk, but in doing so, she drops her guard and her stripper starts gyrating on her, holding her in place.

Here's where I see the first change in her. Her scream is for him to get away from her, like he's got something wrong with him or she'll catch something from coming in contact with him. I resist the urge to pull him off her, trying to remind myself that this is all for show. These guys really have no interest in the women. They are just another audience to shock.

When the song ends, they turn around and bend down, getting ready to pull their g-strings down and the girls' screams sound more like "No!" The strippers expect this to happen and stand up, shrugging at each other and then bow.

The mood of the girls shifts now and they all applaud, whistle and shout, seeming quite relieved that it's over.

It's fascinating stuff.

The ladies all look at each other, holding their palms to their chests, panting like they've been dancing themselves, seeking comfort in telling each other how scared they were when it looked like there were going to be three cocks and six balls on show right in front of them.

Heather calls out for someone to put some music on, fanning herself and laughing at how good it was. The strippers pull their pants back on, take their hats off, and now look like any other man at the party again. Heather hugs them and thanks them for the exciting dance, gushing over the way they moved and entertained her friends.

When they blend back into the crowd, she looks around at us and makes another announcement, "Don't go anywhere everybody. Act 2 is coming up soon."

It's crunch time and we've agreed to go up against three professional dancers and strippers. I tell Emmett not to get his hopes up for us winning. He says he's only interested in winning the girl.

Heather checks her iPod and already has our song, Justin Timberlake's "Rock Your Body," so there's nothing stopping us now.

Bella approaches us, looking worried, asking me what we plan to do. She actually asks outright if we are planning to strip. When I tell her we are just dancing, she's relieved but still dubious.

The dance we're about to do was perfected in high school and we won the talent quest, thinking for a moment in time we were going to be famous. Two weeks later, no one gave a shit we'd spent a month practicing every night, but we knew we were hip hop kings. We'd learned the mechanics of gliding, moon walking and side walking and the dance itself contained only about a dozen moves, just shuffled into different routines. It was all about being able to stop the move right on the beat and keep in time with each other for it to have the effect. We also chose the song because it was slow enough for us to keep up with.

We're ready, and fueled by another ouzo, I have no nerves. I jump up and down a couple of times and shake out my shoulders to limber up. We hear some cat calling from a few women and even some men, which is slightly unsettling. I glance over quickly at Bella whose face is void of emotions. I don't think she knows what to expect and I hope I'm not embarrassing her.

Em and I look at each other, a final challenge to see who will mess up and lose the bet. This is the way we've always been, eleven months apart in age. We should have been twins.

The song starts with sixteen beats of shoulder snaps in the intro before we have to do anything substantial. Then we slide our legs and move our arms in an angular fashion, popping to the beat. We have to improvise without our hats and lapels but the action is just the same and the crowd calls out in approval.

We turn to our sides, rocking our shoulders, then hold on to our pretend hats doing the rippling fluid air humps we practiced for hours to get right.

The crowd goes crazy at this point.

They all start clapping in time with the music and I pray they can keep beat because it will put me off. I'd never forgive myself if I had to make up a half or a full beat, lose the bet and have to continue to the end with Mr. Winner Winner Chicken Dinner's shit-eating grin. I look over and smile at Bella after a spin around and she's smirking and clapping. I can see she's now enjoying this, so maybe it will earn me some points with her after all. God knows I need something to go right because I can't seem to get more than five minutes alone with her.

The arm wave goes off perfectly, Emmett picking it straight up where I left it and sending it back to me. The crowd really likes this part and it seems everyone has a phone out taking a picture. I remember to remind Emmett to smile. That was the job I couldn't forget way back when.

I feel like we're really pulling this off. We're in synch again, like we were back in high school, and as the finale approaches we make one final spin and stop right on the last beat. We pretend we've tipped our hats down and drop our heads, one arm diagonally over our chest, and the crowd erupts as we pant, whistling and applauding.

Neither of us wins the bet. We both remember every step.

Heather has a look on her face like she's both shocked and impressed. She hugs both of us and thanks us as our breathing returns to normal and we get pats on the back when people come over to congratulate us. I'm looking past all of them at one girl with long mahogany hair in a sexy black dress who's grinning, standing alone and waiting for me. As usual, my brother is right. Chicks do love this stuff, no matter what age.

I see Heather smile at her as she leaves us and then Bella sashays over, like she has some new determination towards me. She puts her arms around my neck and before I know it and she's telling me we were sensational. I almost kiss her in the middle of this party but she takes my hand and leads me out of the room. I look back at Em as if I'm in trouble and he gives me a thumbs up as if he planned this whole thing just for me.

…

**One more chapter to go, Heather. The party's not over yet.**

**Much thanks and love to ****Edwards Beachlover who **beta'd this fluff. 


	3. Chapter 3 - Doesn't He Own a Shirt?

**********This fluff was beta'd by Edwards Beachlover and this chapter had the extra eyes of VampyreGirl86 on it. Thank you so much ladies.**

**********...**

**Chapter 3 – Doesn't He Own A Shirt?**

**EPOV**

Bella walks backwards, holding both my hands and when we reach the stairs, she doesn't hold back.

"That was hot. You're hot. God I want you," she says and then kisses me passionately, weaving her fingers in my hair and moaning like we've done this before. Her tongue is up against mine and I can feel her tits pushing into my chest.

Shit, she thinks _I'm_ hot – the girl is like molten lava.

As my hands circle her tiny waist, all I want to do is feel those erect nipples with my thumb but I amaze myself when I'm able to pull us apart and ask if she knows somewhere private. I have to know if she's single before we go any further.

She groans and nods, taking me up the stairs and stops outside the room where we stood in the hallway before.

"Bella, I need I know about your ex-boyfriend. Is he still around or are you seeing anyone else?"

She shakes her head and says, "No, I will never speak to him again and there's been no one since."

That's all I need. I slam her up against the wall and devour her mouth. The sound of her lusty breathing is sending me insane. She wraps her leg around me, pulling me closer, my erection already straining to get at her.

"In here," she purrs, opening the door quickly before I slam her up against it again inside the room. I'm almost eating her neck and squeezing her tits hard enough to hurt her.

"Fuck, I want you to touch me, Edward."

"Oh, I'll touch you. I want all of you."

I slide my hand up her thigh as I push myself against her.

"Oh God!" she pants as her legs automatically open for me and I easily slip my fingers into her panties, crying out for the silky softness that shows her need for me. She's already wet and hot, her clit swollen, ready for me to assault it and as I circle it with my thumb, I thrust two fingers inside her. Her head falls back on the door, she closes her eyes and then they open again, boring into mine, her chest rising and falling in time with what I'm doing. Then she smashes into me with an explosive kiss that could make me come with its force.

She slips her hands down the back of my jeans and squeezes my ass, pulling me onto her, panting in time with the finger fucking. Then she starts moaning loudly into the kiss and before I know it, she's coming all over my fingers.

Fucking hell, it all happened so fast.

"Let's get naked and fuck," she says through hooded eyes that tell me she's just getting started. I kiss her again, nodding into the kiss with wild fantasies flooding my brain, imagining myself fucking her. I lift her, wrapping her legs around me, and sit down on the bed.

I scan my surroundings for the first time and my gut tells me everything about this is wrong.

The room is purple with polka dots and at first, I think I'm seeing spots from the effects of the ouzo. The dots loom out at me as I realize we're in a little girl's bedroom dedicated to dolls and all their accessories. Miniature brushes, vibrant hairpieces, tiny sunglasses, jewelry and outfits adorn a sweet side table and I suddenly feel like I'm intruding.

Then I see it – the reason for all the accessories – a golden haired doll assuming a regal position, smack center of the bed, leaning back on the pillows and eyeballing me like I should have checked in with her first before I dared to come into her sacred realm. She's looking directly at me, challenging me to defy her.

Don't. You. Dare.

I hear the words as if the doll spoke to me. They're coming out of that mouth with its two tiny prominent teeth just as they are written all over that face with its smattering of freckles. I look away, knowing I'm imagining it, that the ouzo is replaying a scene from Chucky's Revenge in my head, the one I had nightmares over for weeks.

My eyes are drawn back to the doll who dominates the bed and now she's telling me I'll regret it forever if I defile the innocent world of the little girl who sleeps here.

She's right. I cannot possibly do this in here and I'm ashamed now of what we've already done that she's witnessed.

Bella pulls my jaw towards her, knowing there's something very strange going on with me all of a sudden, "Please tell me. Have I done something wrong?"

I hug her and say, "God, no, I just… I can't do this. It doesn't feel right in this little girl's bedroom. Can we go somewhere else?"

She looks around as if she's noticing for the first time and says, "Oh no, you are absolutely right. I wasn't thinking very clearly was I?"

"Is there anywhere else we can go?"

Bella looks out the window and just as I think she's about to come up with an alternative, she shakes her head and says, "They're all kid's rooms and we are definitely not going into Heather's. Let's just get out of here. I have condoms in my car."

I look at her sideways, querying that last statement and she shrugs as she answers, "Because of the move, you know, they're in my car."

It makes perfect sense in my sex-hazed-ouzo-riddled mind.

"Can you drive?"

"Sure, Edward, I've only had one ouzo all night."

How the hell did she manage that?

"Well, okay, let's get out of here." I kiss her again, needing a reminder of why we are doing this on the first day we met and it's obvious instantly – she's a fucking great kisser.

Bella tells me she'd be too embarrassed to say goodbye to Heather so we sneak down the stairs like ninjas, checking to make sure our exit path is clear before we take it. I feel like a teenager, creeping out the front without my shirt and by her giggle, I see that she's feeling it too.

She opens the car, sits in the passenger seat, checking the glove compartment, and pulls out something to show me. "Bingo" she says with a grin, holding a box of condoms. "I've got six."

I dissolve into laughter.

She's got six.

I want to fuck this girl badly but her mind and the way she uses it is the truly attractive part of her, so I can't help myself leaning into the car for another kiss. She runs her hand over my neck and then into my hair, grabbing a huge chunk and pulling. The way she moans when she kisses me… I'm going to hell for the thoughts swirling around in my head now.

I start to wonder if we'll even make it out of this car.

Then something in my peripheral vision distracts me. I look up and see the flashing lights of a police cruiser driving slowly down the street. The police radio has several conversations going and it's actually damn loud. As it pulls in across the road, Bella looks over and says, "Shit!"

"They can't lock us up for kissing in the street, can they?"

She keeps checking them as she says, "No, but that's my father in that car. He's a cop."

This fills me with fear. "Which one is he?"

"The big scary one with the porn tash."

Great.

The two cops leave the cruiser, scan their surroundings and click their weapons into their belts. As they walk towards us, the big guy's shoulders slump and he shakes his head at her.

"Why am I not surprised you're here to greet me?"

"What's going on, Charlie?" she says to him as if he's a friend of hers, just popping over to say hi.

"Got a call there was loud screaming coming out of this house," he says to her, still scanning the street.

"Just as well it wasn't murder, then, Dad. They'd all be dead by now."

He narrows his eyes at her but attempts to smile. "Yeah, funny lady. You're not leaving are you? You said you were staying here tonight."

This stops her in her tracks - she doesn't have an immediate answer.

"Just… getting my backpack out of the car. Why, you keeping tabs on me?"

"Sure. I like to know where my daughter is. It's not a crime is it?" He fans his hand out in question. He rolls his eyes at her and then nods in my direction. "And who's this."

"Oh, this is Edward. He's… a friend of mine."

Thank God, she doesn't say how I actually fit into her life, like I'm Tanya's boyfriend or something, because that's how she would have introduced me just a few hours ago.

"Doesn't he own a shirt?"

I chuckle and put my hand out to shake his. I see where she get's it from. He's direct all right and he wouldn't take any snark from me by the look of him.

He's giving me a good squeeze, not enough to do any damage, but looking directly into my eyes when I feel a total system shut down approaching. I haven't washed my hand in contact with his and it's covered with… Bella.

Fucking hell.

I try my hardest to keep my composure but he knows something is up. He senses fear in me and I hope he doesn't pull that gun out because he'll just be spreading… oh fuck.

If Bella and I go on to have a relationship, I hope no one ever asks her in front of me how we met because I will never forget this for as long as I live.

He lets me off easy and chuckles when I open and close my hand to get some circulation back.

Bella's big-scary-porn-tash-gun-toting-cop dad – one.

Edward – zero.

We now have to walk back to the house with them and her dad questions why she doesn't have her backpack. She says she'll get it when she sees them out.

Bella rushes forward and opens the front door calling, "Heather, guess who's here!"

There are some nervous looks from the guests as the two cops walk in.

Charlie falters when he sees all the shirtless men and says, "What the hell?" before looking at Bella to question what she's got herself mixed up in.

Heather, who is holding a tray of food, turns around and her eyes bug out before she sighs in relief and comes over, offering us all some food.

"Don't mind if I do," Charlie takes one of the yummy looking thingies and pops it in his mouth.

"Charlie Swan! I thought that for a minute you were one of those strip-a-gram cops!" She laughs and it's the sound of a wicked confident woman - guttural and girly at the same time. It sounds like the embodiment of mischief, the audible version of the look my brother gets on his face sometimes. I glance around and see only smiles that match my own. That laugh has diffused any tension that came in with the arrival of the police.

"Whoa – you've got your gun on and everything! You know what a man in uniform does to me." She laughs again and I see she's not a bit concerned about cops being here. "Did you come here especially to wish me happy birthday?"

He raises an eyebrow at her as if she should know why he's here. "There was a complaint made about some screaming," he deadpans, looking around the crowd.

"Oh, that was when the strippers were performing or maybe it was when Edward and Emmett were doing their sexy dance. You should have been here then, Charlie. This party was going off!"

He wipes the porn tash with his fingers before speaking. "I'm sure. Well try to keep the noise down or I'll be back. And Heather, you don't want me back, do you?"

It's a threat that falls flat. She winks and kisses him on the cheek, assuring him we'll be good from now on. He grabs another yummy looking thingy for the road and they leave with Bella seeing them out, giving me the eye that tells me not to follow.

It gives me a chance to go to the bathroom and wash my hand. I scrub like I'm about to perform surgery.

When I come back out, Bella is in a private conversation with Heather who is nodding and beaming. She's wearing her backpack on one shoulder. They embrace and then Bella holds her hand out to me. Before I can take it, Heather hugs me, thanks me for the wonderful entertainment and says she hopes she'll see me again soon with Bella.

I'm not inclined to check if Tanya is still here. We see Emmett and Rosalie dancing cheek to cheek on the dance floor with their eyes closed so I don't interrupt them. I ask Heather if she'll say goodbye for me and we wish her one final happy birthday.

We find my shirt and leave hand in hand.

As soon as we get in the car, she looks at me and tells me I have beautiful eyes. I smirk and tell her if she plays her cards right, she's about to see a whole lot more of me.

She leans over and kisses me. The passion floods back and we start all over again. Somehow she pulls away, letting out a huge breath full of air, and says we had better get out of here.

Then she asks, "Where _are_ we going?"

I answer, "My place, turn right up at the end. It's not far."

"Thank God," she mutters to herself and I laugh at her quietly.

Now I'm thinking about the state of my apartment. The kitchen is clean and there's not too much junk lying around. She'll want to use the bathroom at some stage… yeah that's not bad either.

Then I'm sure I hear the sound from that movie _Psycho_ as the knife repeatedly stabs the woman in the shower.

The sheets.

I've jacked off in those sheets.

Twice.

I was going to change them first thing in the morning. I wasn't expecting…

Oh shit.

It's all I can think about. She's got six condoms so at some point we are going to get into those sheets.

For sure.

"You okay, Edward? Not having second thoughts?"

"Me? No? Absolutely not. Can't wait." This is so not the sexy teasing conversation I imagined we'd have on the trip to my place.

I give her directions and try to calm down. She probably thinks my nerves are about my upcoming performance so she giggles and reminds me of some of the funnier things that happened at the party. She especially liked the look on Emmett's face when he told us Rosalie had broken his nose.

I feel a little better.

Then she tells me she thinks I'm the sexiest dancer she's ever seen and the electricity is back. I tell her she's the sexiest woman I've ever seen.

She blushes.

I've never seen such a pretty blush and I tell her she's beautiful when she does it. I have to touch it.

She looks over at me and I want her to pull over.

Immediately.

But there's my street coming up. We pull into the parking lot and I tell her to wait, that I want to open the door for her.

I race around, open it and bring her up into my arms for another searing kiss. Her hands are all over my chest and back and she tells me I feel different with a shirt on. I tell her it's not staying on for long and she moans into the kiss again.

Then she holds up a finger. She's forgotten to get the condoms out of the glove compartment. She shoves them into the backpack and I carry it for her, kissing her hair and holding her gently as we wait for the elevator.

Once the doors slide closed it's on again.

I can't tell which one of us wants this more.

We bump into walls on the way out and I can hardly get the apartment door open.

She pushes me onto the couch and straddles me, kissing me, driving me crazy with the hair-pulling thing, and the on again off again evening's sexual activities catch up with me. I'm so hard now it's hurting, but this might be my only opportunity to change those damn sheets.

I tell her to wait, that I'll be right back. She doesn't understand but she's too polite to be rude. I give her my phone and tell her to look at the video I took of the strippers. She nods but she looks at me suspiciously as if she knows there's something wrong.

I sprint to the closet and get fresh sheets. I sniff them. They're fine. They smell good. I hear her screaming with laughter from the couch. I rip the tainted sheets off the bed like a maniac and shove them in the hamper in the bathroom, squashing them down.

I turn around and she's standing in the doorway, holding the phone and laughing.

"I can't wait to show Heather the look on her face. Oh, you're changing the sheets. That's so sweet, Edward. You're such a nice guy."

Jesus, I had nothing to worry about after all - wasted energy.

"I'll help you!"

This doesn't seem right but I'm not arguing. We're making this bed but we keep looking at each other, smirking. We both know what's about to happen.

The phone starts to ring right next to her and she looks at it.

"It's Alice. Do you want to take it?"

I nod, thinking there could be trouble if my sister is calling at this hour.

"Hi, is everything okay?" I ask, scratching the back of my neck.

_"Where the hell are you?"_

"At home. Why?"

_"Don't bullshit a bullshitter, Eddy boy! You're out with Emmett and male strippers! I've been looking at the photos and the latest include my two brothers doing a shirtless dance!"_

"What the fuck? Where can you see this?"

_"Facebook baby. Someone shared them with someone I'm friends with. You have quite the internet presence tonight! Where are you?"_

It feels like my kidneys contract. "That was earlier. We were at a party. I'm home now."

_"Some party Edward. Why wasn't I invited?"_

"Al, it's late. I'll call you tomorrow okay?" I suddenly feel very tired.

_"Sure, I'll keep checking to see if any more pop up. I'll share them with you."_

"Night Alice." I cut the conversation off there and go straight to Facebook.

Sure enough, the images are on my wall. There are even a couple of dodgy videos with distorted screaming. I can see why my sister called me because it looks a lot worse than it was.

I close it and slam the phone down on the bed. I've had enough. Every single time I get close to this girl something happens to break us apart.

Every. Single. Fucking. Time.

I look down at my feet, feeling sorry for myself, and I feel little fingers playing with my hair, trying to push it back so she can see me.

"Don't worry about it, Edward. At least you look hot and anyone who was there will say you were really good."

I turn my head and smile at her. She really is a nice chick. I kiss her and she kisses me back but it's not full of passion, it's tender and sweet. It's the kind of kiss I haven't had from a girl in years. My head is so full of this heavenly kiss that I hardly realize she's standing up when she leaves. I drop my head again, feeling frustrated and disappointed, wondering if I'll ever get more than five minutes with her, so sick of these short bursts of intense sexual activity that never lead anywhere. I can't take this much longer.

She comes straight back in, holding her phone. She powers it off. She grabs mine and does the same. Then she shows me what else she has in her hand. It's a condom and she's pouting. She looks like the sweetest thing I've ever seen and I melt.

She kisses my cheek and then she moves to my jaw as she starts to undo the buttons of my shirt. Her tongue is in my ear when she peels the shirt off my shoulders and then she repeats what she did at Heather's front door. She waits for my permission by looking intently into my eyes and then slides the sleeves down.

She flings the shirt on a chair and then pulls her dress up over her head in one movement, leaving a satiny black bra that matches the panties I already know about.

This is finally a huge step forward – maybe this night isn't going to be the sequel to _Groundhog Day_ after all.

I run my hands over her hips and she pushes me gently back on the bed. She undoes the button on my jeans and pulls them right off, taking my boxers with them and then looks at my dick – standing to attention – for her.

Her eyes are like saucers and then her eyes roam up my body, stopping at my eyes. She smirks and says, "Even better than I imagined and that's really saying something mister."

She runs both hands down over my chest, all the way down and opens my legs wider. She slides her fingers over the length of my dick, over my balls and back up again, rubbing her thumb around and over the leaking head.

I hiss from the sensation and she looks up at me, pumping me, willing me to kiss her by licking her bottom lip. She lifts her thigh, rubs it on my outer leg and I snap. I sit up and undo the bra, unable to wait another moment before I can get her tits in my mouth. She moans and throws her head back, fingering my balls roughly now, as I circle her nipples with my tongue and watch her enjoy what I'm doing to her.

I roll her over and her fingers move to my hair as she hums into every breath. I'm harder now than I ever thought possible and humping her leg. My fingers dig into the flesh of her back as my arms hold her in place, never wanting to let go of this incredibly sexy wanton sweet girl.

"Take the panties off and fuck me. Please, I need you inside me."

I have to loosen my hug and leave the softness of her tits to achieve this but her lifting her hips and then her legs, allow me to get them off quickly. I stare at her exquisite pussy and dip my fingers in, calling out when I feel how wet she is. I return to her lips and she kisses me back like she's starving for me as much as I am for her.

We never had to go through that awkward phase of getting used to each other's kissing. It was perfect from the first time my tongue met hers.

In this position, I can rub my dick into her folds and over her clit. Her back arches, maybe because she needs the contact of those nipples against my skin, so I pinch them roughly, still kissing her mouth.

We're in very dangerous territory right now. It would be easy to slip in without protection when she's so wet but she groans and her hand pats the bed, feeling for the condom. I start to chuckle into the kiss and say, "I'll get it."

I push back on my knees, grab the condom and rip the packet open with my teeth. I roll it down and start kissing her ravenously, wasting no time pushing into her, each thrust getting me deeper, closer to the exquisite feeling of deep penetration.

She moans again as I squeeze her delicious tits, wanting to suck on them but unable to stop kissing her lips yet because fucking her and kissing her at the same time is an overpowering sensation I don't want to give up.

I sweep my hand over her tummy and press on her clit. Her pussy clenches me and she breaks the kiss just enough to articulate between pants, "Just like that, oh fuck yes, Edward, just like that!"

I do as I'm told and it's the last coherent thing either of us says… for a while.

*T*H*E***P*A*R*T*Y

It's now three weeks since the birthday party and Heather's coming over tonight after Bunco. She wants to find out first-hand what's going on with Bella since she hasn't been at her apartment and she never answers her phone.

She's worried about her.

She should be worried about me.

The girl has turned me into her sex slave. I've had to learn to cook because she won't let me eat any crap and cooking with Bella is… interesting. When we're not eating we're fucking on every surface of my apartment, so it's been easier for her to stay with me. She hasn't gone back to live with Rosalie and Tanya yet and two of those red suitcases have settled in nicely in my spare bedroom.

I want them to stay there because I am so not fucking bored any more.

It feels like a nice change to be fully clothed and presentable in the apartment tonight. I'm not sure how long I can last without kissing her but I'm going to give it a try. I last nearly three minutes.

I drink my beer and think about Heather's grilling, hoping I'll last a bit longer.

I last two minutes and forty-two seconds.

Bella giggles at me and we rub noses. She does cute little things like that. She gives good massages too. She even rubs my feet. She wanted to paint my toenails one night because she said I had sexy toes.

I let her.

It was worth it to see her tongue poking out when she concentrates and that tongue of hers has become my best friend.

I'm falling in love with her – truly, madly, deeply falling in love with her.

We buzz Heather up and look forward to our first visitor as a couple. Bella asks her if she won and she says having a night off with her friends is the win.

We hold hands on the couch and Heather sits opposite us. It feels a little like she's going to counsel us, convince us that staying at home all the time and fucking is wrong.

I feel like I'm about to be attacked first when she looks at me and takes a big breath.

"Edward, I have an apology to make to you."

That's a surprise. "For what, Heather, you've done nothing to me... have you?"

"Yes I have." The concerned look and her nodding worry me. "And my conscience is killing me. The night of the party, when I found out you were Tanya's Edward I… I didn't want you anywhere near Bella because, you know, the last boyfriend was…"

"A complete asshole." Bella finishes the sentence perfectly.

"Exactly… and I'm very protective of my girl."

"Okay, did you do it or were you just thinking about it?"

"Oh no, I actually did it. I told some people that you and your brother were strippers. I… I wanted to see your reaction."

Well, at least that explains a few things. I now know that people weren't presuming we were strippers for some other reason.

"Oh God, I feel terrible! When you entered the talent quest, I thought that would sort you out but you amazed me. I mean that seriously. You were great!"

"So… is that it, Heather?"

She presses her lips together before going on. "I wish. I put Bella in my youngest daughter's bedroom, wondering if you would stoop so low to have sex in there but you didn't did you?"

We both shake our heads as if we are school kids.

She scrunches up her face. She's obviously been beating herself up about this, and I'm not really angry, but how much more can there be? She really tried to do a number on me.

"Then I called Charlie to come over. I thought he would intimidate you."

I start to laugh. "He was pretty intimidating but for some reason he likes me."

"That's because I put in a good word for you, Edward, you know, since you passed all my tests."

When Bella's father invited us over a week ago, I kept replaying our ill-fated first meeting in my head. I knew he was checking me out, ready to put a stop to this somehow if I didn't measure up.

The evening ended up being a total success for a few reasons. We talked a lot about my being a doctor and my plans for my career when he suggested a path I had never considered.

He told me about the tampering scandal at the State Police Crime Laboratory and the shake up of the staff afterwards. He mentioned the jobs he'd recently seen advertised and offered to make a few calls to get me an interview. He said after working for thirty years on the force, he knew half the cops in Boston.

Heather sits back on the couch comfortably watching our entwined fingers with a look of pride on her face.

"You know I'll always feel like I brought you two together."

"And Emmett and Rosalie?"

Her mouth fell open when she asked, "They're still together too?"

No one was more shocked than I was. I never saw that one lasting past the weekend. "Yep, they're crazy about each other. That was really some party, Heather."

"Hmm, that gives me an idea for next year…"

…

**Happy, Happy Birthday Heather Maven.**

**May all your birthdays be filled with parades, marching bands and fireworks, and good wishes from the triangle of curls girls.**

**The other two in this triangle of stories written for Heather's birthday are:**

**Taming Bella - a collab between CullensTwiMistress and Maplestyle  
**

**A hairy situation puts Bella in an awkward position. A birthday present for Heather Maven from two of her triangle of curls girls.**

**and**

**Tabletop Romp by LayAtHomeMom**

**In 1984, I went to the movies and fell in love with a boy kissing a girl over ****a birthday cake on a table. It's 2013 and that same boy is kissing me on a ****table...in my birthday suit. A Jake Ryanward O/S for Heather Maven's birthday.**

**...**

The Party has been nominated in the poll to find the Top Ten Favourite Fics completed in October over on www twifanfictionrecs . com. Poll ends December 1st. There are a heap of good stories this month so go check them out and give me a nod if you enjoyed mine.


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